me: so to review, we started here.
friend with clothing line: ha ha! the dumpy one.
me: she's not dumpy. she's not dumpy, she has a normal-looking— you know what? i promised myself i wasn't going to get into, uh, this whole
fwcl, unconvinced: i guess it's cute that you're all fired up about this.
me: yes. sure. moving on.
micah, from a distance: YO WE WERE GONNA PLAY BASKETBALL
me: GIVE ME LIKE FOUR MINUTES.
fwcl: i love this one! HI-YAH. i love it.
me:
fwcl: she looks like a samurai woman.
me: she has a bun, and is short.
fwcl: i effing love her. i mean, we can't use this, obviously.
me: i thought we could get into some culturally different, uh, territory
fwcl: that's really just going to confuse people.
me: yes. so here's clotilda—and already we're getting away from the sort of, positive-body-image thing,
fwcl: the coconut bra, yeah.
me: yeah. it's not a coconut bra.
fwcl: you can be honest: have you ever seen a bra?
me:
fwcl: i'm KIDDING.
me: i just don't want some plus-sized girl to look at this, and feel really bad about herself.
fwcl: yes. well.
me: or go on a psychotic murder spree, and kill all the hot chicks. i would feel terrible if that happened.
fwcl: girl #3 has stubby legs.
me: her boobs are awesome.
fwcl: they're probably too big. they're probably fake.
me: no! NO.
fwcl:
me: in nature, you can achieve boobs of this size.
micah: YO ROB WANTS TO KNOW WHY YOU WROTE ALL OVER HIS POSTCARD ON THE FRIDG
me: ROB NEEDS TO RELEARN HIS GODDAMNED APOSTROPHE USAGE.
fwcl: what was next?
me: number four.
fwcl: this girl is a SLUT.
me: this girl is basically a robot prostitute from the future.
fwcl: she needs to CHILL OUT.
me: long legs, huge boobs. somehow the dress is clingy as all hell.
fwcl: too clingy. too short! the dress isn't even that short.
me: it is when your body is shaped like that.
fwcl: i almost feel sorry for this girl.
me: i'm going to be honest here: drawing her made me feel gross. i felt like my hairline was receding.
fwcl: your hair looks fine.
me: i just got it cut at this new place.
micah: ARE WE PLAYING BALL OR WHAT
me: SOON
me: YOU GUYS CAN START WITHOUT ME
micah: NO, YOU NEED THE MOST TIME TO PRACTICE YOUR SHOT
micah: YOU CAN'T EVEN MAKE A LAYUP
fwcl: you can't?
me: here's number five!
fwcl: layups are easy.
me: shutting up is easy! for you.
fwcl: this girl has got it going on.
me: she's basically number three with better shoes.
fwcl, reverently: YES.